Thursday, May 19, 2011

Even skinny girls have cellulite

I speak from experience.

I consider myself on the skinny side. Not super model thin but more like slender with a little jiggle...and a touch of cellulite.

I'd like to say my little dimples don't bother me but then I'd be lying. It's like I woke up one day and realized that I'm in my LATE twenties instead of my Early twenties and that there is a big difference between  the two. My dreams off being discovered as America's Next Top Model in the local mall are over now.

I started dying my hair on a regular basis to cover the gray instead of doing it to look fashionable.

I stopped looking in the Juniors department when I go clothes shopping now.

I slather on extra 70 SPF sunscreen when I go out.

I don't think I even own a pair of thong underwear anymore.

And I just purchased my first bottle of cellulite cream.

I should put a sign on the front door that says "Welcome to almost 30".

My husband has no sympathy for me or my cellulite. My husband has the most perfectly smooth, lump free man bum I've ever seen. When I complain to my husband about my cellulite his response is "then you should bike to work, I do". I swear to God that is what he just said to me as I typed this post. So apparently my husband has the perfect un-lumpy rump because he bikes one sixteenth of a mile to his job everyday.

Anyway, back to me and my car ride loving cellulite.

I'm pretty sure that cellulite cream works...but not the way it was intended. You see, ladies like myself buy the cream/lotion/goo and proceed to rub themselves down with it while praying to the cottage cheese fairy  to take it all away. But subconsciously we try to eat better and exercise more... like taking the stairs 2 at a time instead of one at a time or doing lunges down  the school hallway instead of walking like a normal person. And over time we notice fewer dents and jiggles so we think, "This cellulite cream is a miracle!".

I know this is true and yet I can not stop myself  from buying the overpriced  tube of hope and replaying in my head the scene from Silence of the Lambs... "It rubs the lotion on it's skin or it gets the hose again!"


  1. Any type of person can have cellulite, but also any type of person can get rid of it. The most efficient recipe is to do a cellulite removal treatment and after to start some exercises together with a healthy diet. this will never fain, even if you want to remove cellulite or to prevent it.

  2. I've been pretty lucky up till I turned 40. No cellulite, no weight gain... I could pee twice a day, and be alright!!... But then I turned 40; and in the course of my forties, my own body has gone through a number of changes, for which I've been kicking and screaming, if not flat-out DENYING! None of it has worked for me... I am now getting closer and closer upon f- f- fifty. I don't know if I like it, but all things considered, I think I'm still looking o.k., and like they say, it's better than the alternative, right?!... Cute post! Have a great weekend! ~tina

  3. Haha! I think you speak the truth here ;) I have one more year till I hit 30 and the number of gray hairs on my head are growing exponentially! It's alarming...

  4. Cellulite is not a "real" anatomical nor medical term. It is a term someone made up to make us feel better than what "adipose tissue" would make us feel - - - which is of course what cellulite REALLY is.

    And every human being on the PLANET has it - - - it is actually made up of cells which have filled up with fat. It has numerous GOOD purposes - - - cushioning to protect, insulation, storage of nutrients for later use.

    But none of us like it - - - we hate how it looks on us. And, truth be told, some of us (me for example) have "collected" more of it than is necessary for protection, insulation, or food storage against future famines!

    Hope you have a great day, Miss Courtney!

    Especially now that I was so BLUNT about the whole fat cells issue - - - -

  5. we still love you no matter what happens girl XX

  6. the Silence of the Lamb quote ;) Tell DH he do "you know what" with his potato lovin', skinny ass bod...we ARE all jealous!!! I wish I could eat the junk he eats without it all ending up in my trunk...God is a man...only he would punish us with cellulite because he made man in his image first and messed it up by putting the balls out in the open...lmao So there!!! I go to the tanning salon cause brown cottage cheese looks better that white cottage cheese AND sunscreens are bad for ya (really...they are a conspiracy ;)

  7. YOu always have such a witty and interesting way of putting things my dear! Love it! Speaking of Adipose tissue...that's that ugly brown stuff that is now protruding ever so much more from my front side....I would rather have a larger Axx than the belly layer which is unhealthy! LOL No matter what, start a routine now cuz it's harder to start when ou wait till you are 50 plus like me!
    Love you!


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